Rejected Rejection

I wanted to see if something I performed at The Rejection Show would get rejected if I submitted it for publication. If it were to be accepted I might of had to shut down as my rejected and accepted universes collided...but sure enough...it was rejected.....


Tempting, but I’m afraid that in the end, we’re going to pass. I do appreciate the look.

From: "Jon Friedman" <>>>>>>>@hotmail.com>
Date: Fri, 12 Nov 2004 15:08:43 -0500
Subject: Rejected "Snaps!" Submissions

Rejected “Snaps!” Submissions
By Jon Friedman

Rejected “Snaps!” Submissions

Snaps: Creative insults from a unique African-American comic art form.

--Your momma’s cookies are so delicious that every time I bite into one I feel like I’m tasting heaven, motherfucker.

--Your momma is so contractually obligated to Verizon that she will be making phone calls with them for two years.

--Your momma’s intake of high fructose corn syrup is ridiculous.

--Your momma looks so much like you that there is no question that you were not adopted. Your father on the other hand looks like a washed up, run down Ray Liotta. What’s that, your father is Ray Liotta?

--Your momma is so fat that she researched gastric bypass surgery on the Internet after witnessing Al Roker’s mediocre success with it.

--Your father is so gay that he admitted it to your momma and now he has the confidence to move forward in a world that has always told him he cannot be who he truly is.

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